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Max Payne 3 & Portal 2 Delayed

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E3 2010 is fast approaching.

While we’ve been seeing game announcements (such as Infamous 2) being made early, publishers have also decided to announce game delays. Today, we have two delays.

Take-Two is delaying Max Payne 3 (PC, 360 PS3) until sometime after November 2010 while Valve shuffled Portal 2 into sometime in 2011. However, seeing how it’s Valve and Portal, there was a cute little press release associated with their announcement.

VALVE ANNOUNCES MAKING GAMES IS HARD

June 9, 2010 — Aperture Science, doing business as Aperture Laboratories LLC, in partnership with Valve today announced the successful completion of an ethics-review-panel-supervised release date restructuring process. Portal 2, the sequel to the ground-breaking title that earned over 30 Game of the Year awards despite missing its original ship date, is now targeted for a 2011 release.

Representatives from both companies acknowledged that public safety concerns factored into the decision. They went on to say that even though Portal 2 will arrive slightly later than planned, all life on earth won’t instantaneously stop as every molecule in your body explodes at the speed of light, which is what would happen should a rip ever appear in the fabric of Valve Time.

“Also, the game will be even better,” they added, missing an historic opportunity to create the first product delay press release to mention that a product is being delayed to make it worse.

To ask questions about how close we all came to dying, or to ask futile questions about the previously announced E3 ***PORTAL-2-THEMED-FOR-GOD’S SAKE*** surprise or, less futilely, to schedule an appointment to attend a Portal 2 screening at the Valve booth during E3, please contact Valve’s delegate to the EU’s Valve Time Studies Group, Doug Lombardi.

Needless to say, I’m looking forward to both of these titles. Whenever they show up.

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